Saturday, March 6, 2010

Stop Tellling Me the Truth ...

My mom is visting and I LOVE MY MOM.  She is truly one of my favorite people on earth and I really dig hanging out with her.  She is very smart, super funny and she is always completely honest with me ...
Buuut, I just learned (and I am really slow about these things) ... that the honesty thing NO LONGER works for me.  Here's why:

While looking in the mirror (which used to be fairly enjoyable),
I say,"I should really get my eye lids lifted." 
My mom says, "Yes you REALLY should." 

I don't know what the scary look I shot her said, but in her cute mom fashion she tried to back peddle a little.

"Really, it's easy and fast and it's fun ... "
FUN?????  Holy crap, she was supposed to say something like "No dear, you don't need a ... you're way too young for a ... "

"I should really get a face lift (see, SLOW learner)."
"Well no not yet, but you could start thinking about it in a few years."
WRONG ANSWER! ... The right one sounded like this in my head ... "Don't be silly, you are decades away from needing a ... " Forget it! ...

"My stomach is huge."
"No, your STOMACH is not fat."  Yeah, OK Honest Abe, go ahead and tell me where I AM FAT ... 'cause I could hear it ...

This is what we loved about our moms, when we really wanted to hear the truth, but not anymore.  I am gonna institute a "NO TRUTH" policy with my mom ... well, if she'll let me ... she's still the boss of me, afterall ...


  1. Hahahahaaha. AND you know what?
    She's not the only boss of you.

  2. I love that no one told me she was visitng