Friday, September 24, 2010

Slippery Slope

Once again I find myself in a state of such confusion that my brain hurts...

I was at Fresh and Easy, my new favorite grocery store, the other morning in my uber small town. This was just post workout so I was soaking wet and maybe a little less than my normal attractive self.

I was checking out and saw a friend coming into the store. I waited for her to come a little closer before I flagged her down. She turned around the corner and looked right at me. She started to look away. She did a double take..then a TRIPLE take. Honest to God can it be that bad???
The short answer to this is, yep...IT CAN!!! Crap!

SO naturally; because I guess you can't see my eyeball since my eyelids are so old and puffy that they can't do anything but hang there; we discuss who will be doing our eyelifts. She has the name of the BEST eyelift guy...blah blah...in Beverly Hills.

OMG, am I gonna go to Bev Hills and have my eyes lifted?
Well I guess since this seems to be a fairly common topic when I run into people I haven't seen in a while and my mom's favorite topic whenEVER she sees me...the short answer here is also, YEP...I AM!!! Holy Crap!

I am not sure who I am anymore.
When did all these weird things happen to me? When did I get so old that people I have known for ages don't recognize me? I admit the post workout look probably didn't help, but REALLY. When did I become a person that stands in the grocery store and discusses plastic surgeons in Beverly Hills. Dear God...I think I might be on the other side of the mountain of life...

I want a limo-like sled for this journey fully equipped with a TV, a library and champagne, loads of it.... I am gonna sit back and enjoy the ride. And no matter what the Hub says, my dogs will be allowed on my SLED furniture.

After the EYELIFT!!!

FYI: When the wayward lids affect your vision (like in my extreme case) I think insurance will pay for it. I just need to find a reason for the tummytuck....

4 comments:

  1. I may not be a fan of the eyelift, but definitely a fan of the dogs on the sled furniture

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  2. noooo don't do it, you are perfect how you are !!! and i'm not just saying thiisssss !!!
    -j.v.

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  3. OK THANKS A LOT
    Last night I dreamed that Dr. Oz did a facelift including eyes, which I did not ask for. Then he transported me home in a minivan with garbage rolling around in it.
    Then when I got home, Mom was in some brand new scrubs (monogramed like a a waitress in a diner) that Dr. Oz had provided for her because she assisted in the surgery. Oh, and you and your brother and my kids were all the same age, running around like maniacs, while I was trying to recuperate.....things never CHANGE

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  4. My mother in law had that surgery because her lids were so heavy, it interfered with her vision. Insurance didn't pay for it, however. Sorry. (This was done at Mayo.)
    And Kaki? No more popcorn before bed. Your dreams are scaring me!

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